I think my children must arise and call me cranky most days...ha! Is that the joyous life God has planned for me? Probably not. I have been reading through Proverbs 31, just over and over, to try and become the mom and wife I am supposed to be. Today I was reading in the footnotes of my study Bible, and read this definition for blessed: One who enjoys happy circumstances and from whom joy radiates to others. Sometimes I feel guilty for being happy, almost as if someone who would rather I be miserable is in the room with me, someone who secretly wishes for failure, drama and chaos. I know who that person is...the enemy of my soul. I need to realize that the lover of my soul, God, wants me to be blessed, to enjoy happy circumstances, to enjoy the blessings that HE has given me! And probably just as much as he wants me to enjoy it, he wants me to share that joy with others, to let others see his light, his hope, his peace, and JOY that he brings!
Lord, will you please help me with this today? I beg you to just fill up my heart for these children and this husband! I beg you to give me energy, enthusiasm, and most of all a love and joy that spills out to my family and friends. Please Lord, I trust you with this today. Amen.
Monday, September 03, 2012
Saturday, September 01, 2012
This morning I am thankful for September, and the rest of the "ber" months, as my sister says! There are just a million things I look forward to this time of year, pumpkins, candles, bonfires, football, falling leaves, apple cider...I could go on and on! I just love it! Autumn fills me with a new energy for homemaking, nesting, and mama-ing! I think it's the promise of cooler temperatures, snuggly kids, and family time together that just brings so much JOY!
I have been meaning to update on my health, but every time I sit down to write about it I become discouraged, and discouragement is one of the enemy's greatest weapons, so I have been avoiding it. I had a small "bump" in the road with my health and weightloss. I had been noticing a lump on my belly, just to the lower right side of my belly button. It seemed to be getting larger, so I talked to my doctor about it. She ordered an x-ray, but didn't see anything abnormal in them. Two months later I visited her again, after losing my first 20 pounds, and she said it was more noticable, and seemed larger to her. She ordered a CT scan, and the results revealed a "small" hernia that was about 3 cm, that had already allowed a large amount of tissue to escape. She referred me to a surgeon, and on August 6th I had outpatient surgery to correct it. When I woke up from surgery I was shocked at the size of incision to correct my "small" hernia. She said it was much larger than she initially thought, and the hernia opened up through my rectus abdominus muscle, and she had never seen anything like it before. I think I slept for two whole days after surgery, and had a lot of pain. I have been slowly getting back to normal, and the swelling from the surgery is just now down. I am ready to get started again on my healthy living plan, but I feel like I have lost so much ground. I am determined, however, not to give up! I need to go grocery shopping for some healthy foods again, and just get myself up in the mornings to begin walking again...I CAN still do this! I just wanted to share this here, because I want to always remember the journey, even the "bumps" along the road!